I FOUND LOVE!

 I didn't know what love is before I met

Having someone open doors for me, 

Going on dates or receiving chocolate

Is what I assumed was love 

But then I met an introvert

My one and only who doesn't love loud places

Who values time spent together indoors

Cooking, cleaning,bonding and even Netflix and chill

She made me view love in a different angle

She was the ultimate definition of love

From the nights cuddled by her side

To the days spent talking about everything and anything

It felt like home being with her

My heart and body desired nothing more

I always look forward to end of day

When we'll return to the house together

Talk of how good or bad our day was

Tell how the hustle's been

Encourage each other of a better tomorrow

Because that's what love is

Having a shoulder to always lean

And that's new way of loving

As taught by my new found lover

Thank you for always encouraging me

For the many compliments you have showered me with

For the lengthy call when you are not around 

For always knowing how to put a smile on my face

Thank you for being my jewel

For reminding me how precious I am

You my darling are the definition of love 

Thank you for showing me how great it is to be loved 

I truly have found love that's best for me.

© Purple Diva X CrucialArts

A CHAT WITH DEATH!!

I had a chat with Death Last night 

I had some questions for it

Guess what it said

C; So Bro,why do you come for young kids?

D; Because I want them pure before they get to the world

C; But don't you know the smallest coffin hurts most?

D; But you guys,I see you mourning also the old

C; Yes we do,but the hurt ain't the same,

     I mean,the old has already had their share of life

     But the younglings?

D; What's the difference?

C; Okay, picture this

     A mother coming out of the hospital bed empty handed

Healing a Wound without the fruits of it?

Were it you, How would you feel?

D; Okay,I guess I get your point

C; Oh do you? Let's see

     You took 5 kids

      5 bro,why wouldn't you leave atleast 2 or three?

     The country was happy for the couple

    Then you decided to visit and do your worst

D; Woo,, don't blame me for that,the babies weren't to term yet

  How did you expect they'd survive?

C; They were in a nursery,I guess they'd have made it out

    Some or even all of them,right?

D; Do you even know how this works?

C; No I don't,how about you enlighten me

D; Nope,not now. I have some incomplete works to finish 

C; Which works? You have some families to visit and do the worst?

D; That's what I do, That's all I know how to do

C; Yeah, you're never happy seeing people smiling even one bit

D; That's not it, I am never happy myself. Why would I be sad alone?

C; How about,you just die and leave forever,never to come back? huh!

D; Is that even an option?

C; I don't know bro,just giving my opinion.

D; Okay,goodbye for now,I hope my answers were satisfying

C; Well,no they weren't. Goodbye,maybe I'll see you again tonight.

I CHOOSE PEACE!

Mimi si preacher 

but napreache peace

mimi si athlete

but naipeleka adi kwa race

sisi sote ni wakenya

kukushow hivyo sitahesitate

damu yako na yangu twaweza ipaste

ndani yetu red ndio flow

so ata tushikane,there'll be no shock

koz tunaryme ki blood flow

usiangalie skin colour,sisi sote rangi ya thao

uwe dark ama bright

usimind,kuna waliobleach

Jan-Dec tuko na wewe huko beach

lakini mbona Siku flani ifike unigeukie

mkuki unitie

bullet utumilie kwa yangu heart

petrol umebeba ukachome yangu hut

utani tena kati yetu hakuna,it hurts

just because MTU WAKO alikulipa punch

akakushow enda huko,face zao uzipunch

na yeye akabaki kwake akirelax

remote mkononi breaking news akiwatch

shule ya mtoi wako umetia kiberiti

church yako mtaani ukamwagia petroli

mawe ukatupia nyumba ya jirani

haya yote MTU WAKO anawoch kwa teli

after a week ndio utarealise ulitumiwa

koz marafiki hunao tena

ulishawatafuna kama miwa

mama mboga kumbe alienda?koz ulichoma yake kibanda

mwenye duka hayuko pia,oh! kumbe biashara yake ulivamia

umebaki mwenyewe 'kijililia

MTU WAKO tena hapatikani,hafiki tena mashinani

alishatumia yako imani

sasa umebaki ukimlaumu nani??

cc  Crucial

HAPPY DECEMBER!

 Hello December,

Welcome we have been waiting for you,

Grateful that you are finally here,

So let's say a few things to you.

What do you have in store for us?

Holidays left right and center

Please keep everyone of us for 31st

Let us not loose anyone

We wanna welcome 2022 in a chorus

We say thanks for still being here

And many thanks that we were healthy and fine

That we escaped Covid and tragedies

We are grateful for being here

Even as we celebrate with family and friends

We promise to also remember the less privileged

We'll share with orphans and care for the aged

Not forgetting those in the hospital beds

We've been doing it but we will prioritize

We hope the sick will get healed

We pray that things get better for those around us

As we help, we ask you be tender to them all

So that we may all be happy for the season

Welcome December

They've given you a new name

They're now calling you "DrinkCember"

Not a bad nickname,right?

They should drink responsibly though

We've had enough heartbreaks

And as they drink 

Let them be careful

Bills will still be waiting next year

Fees and more expenses at the door

So we hope they will spend cautiously

We have had enough surprises

Okey Festive month 

We are ready for you

I know you've been ready for us all along

The rains cleansed you for us

Don't let us down

Yours truly;

Purple Diva X CrucialArts

TELL ME!

Tell me

If today I said I love you

Would you believe?

Would you just snob and leave,

Or you'd smile and say 'me too'?

Tell me

If I proposed to you,

Would you let me put a ring

Would you say 'yes I do'

and allow us start a home?

Tell me

Just tell me

What would your reaction be?

After knowing I have your feelings

And you're the one I wanna spend my future with

If today you said you love me

I'd look around and ask if you were talking to me

I'd look at you in a romantic sort of way

And say you are a very sweet person

Of course I'd be a little shaken

With a cold stomach

And a mind wanting so much to believe you

And a soul wanting so much to be attached to yours

But I'd look direct at your rose stained eyes

And say that I love you too

Coz those are the words that matter

Words enough to create a love letter that when read, would create an eruption inside my heart

And a collapse of the pillars that make me.

If you'd propose to me today

My earth would be stilled a little

My brain would stop a moment

As I listen to the sensual rapture of butterflies in my stomach

I'd take a little steps back

And come back again running and hug you

As I let the universe know that I love you too

I'll promise not to hurt you and your feelings

And with every new sunrise

I'd kiss a nerve of your body

And leave love notes on flesh.

Crucial × Ochy

I WISH I HAD A SISTER!!

 I wish I had a sister

Either young or older

I'd have a blood confidant

The person who I'd run to,day and night

When I need a shoulder to lean on

I wish to have a sister

But I'll make sure to have a daughter

So that I can treat her like my sister

I wish I had a sister

To laugh with on happy days

To run to after bad dates

Life would definitely be easier

Coz all days would run smooth with a sister

I wish I had a sister

To tell how my day was

To wake up to and tell her about my dreams

To make plans with about our future

And for her to help me choose my partner

I wish I had a sister

My secrets I would share

Her goals I would help achieve

Each dawn I would awake in joy

Coz with her all would be achievable

I wish I had a sister

To wipe away my tears

When I go through a heartbreak

To curve my lips downwards

And say it will be alright

I wish I had a sister

Warm hugs we would share

Great meals we would share

As we chat about all and nothing

Coz there would be true love

I wish I had a sister

But at least I have brothers

Am glad to have them as my siblings

But I still wish I had a sister

Because we'd share more than a brother

CrucialArts X Purple_Diva  

FEELS!!

Yesternight I lay my head on that pillow

for the first time it felt like it's made of willows

staring at the ceiling smoking the last blunt I had

how I wish that your feelings for me were equal

I admit I have your feelings

But yours is more of an obsession

You're so much insecure

That alone makes me scared

Because I don't know what your next action will be

When you spot me by the roadside 

With the same friends you don't wanna see

I mean breath, 

let it ease a little,

i'm not pleased,

our love is kinda fizzling out,

you don't take it easy on me,

you won't take it easy with me,

you cut me open don't leave me bleeding.

Am sorry if that's what you feel

But consider me too

Stop scaring my feelings

Don't want to loose my friends

Stop being so jealous

I promised to love only you

But you're making it hard for me to

Because I'm scared of you

let me in 

you gotta let me in

open up to me more than you did to your exes,

you can count on me,

only if you stop doubting me,

may be then I'll stop feeling like it's an illusion..

It'll take time to heal

From all the emotional bruises you caused

I always thought you care

But all you did was scare

Why don't you trust me for once?

Why do you always think am a cheat?

You say that I belong to the streets

Just because am friendly to every Harry,Tom and Dick

But just know that's my personality

Treating every person equally

I don't want no drama,

not from you my friends or my mama,

I'm so used to karma,

every action I take I'm expecting another,

so watch how you treat me love,

i might be the best guy you'll ever have,

last heart you'll ever touch,

since I'm the only one who understands your heart.

Haha,sorry to burst your bubbles

but don't blow your own trumpet

There are others out there who are more perfect

Only that you're my heart's choice and not them

So play your cards well and don't make me regret

When I decide to give us a second chance 

Cease juggling with my feelings

cease tampering with it,

cease tampering with the process,

don't be a hater of progress,

me and you can make it happen,

we could stay in love and travel the world,

tell me love wouldn't you love that.

I'd definitely love that

But my happiness comes first

All you do is make me sad

You know I've worked hard on us

To make us last

But my dreams you always cut

You always drag us back

And we start all over again at square one

Will we live like that??

You're always failing your promise to change

The blame is on me,

has always been me,

and I take it gladly since I want to make something off of it this time,

this time I want a happy ending,

this time i want to keep your loving,

this time I'll sacrifice lots of things,

this time I'll change for reals,

for you and for me,

you deserve better it's true,

and I haven't been anything else than a fool,

i starve your mind from the peace that you need,

I stay locked far away when you need me,

and that type of shit is killing us,

I swear I don't want that for us.

Then let this be the final time we reunite

Let this be the last chance you break your promise

I always want the best of best for us

Because you're always my heart's choice

However hard I try to deviate

It seems you're my fate

That's a reality I can't seem to change

You're the last person that I wanna hate

So please don't push it

Let's live in unity

I don't give you anything you want,

I might not get that "everything" you want,

I won't promise you tomorrow,

this whole thing could get blown by the wind any minute,

but right now all I know is you,

all I want is you,

my heart belongs to you,

you are the only one I want to do,

when the fear of the unknown  comes through it reminds me of you,

I let it slide as soon as it kicks in,

can't feed my soul with thoughts of me on my own without you,

sucks like a flu.

Okey babe I've heard you

Let's forget the past and start a new 

Because I can't imagine me without you

I don't want to be a victim of I wish I knew

Because you're the only one that my heart beats for

I love you to an extreme it actually hurts

But if am the one you wanna do life with

Let's give it a final shot I hope it'll work

I pray it works out,

I want it to work out,

I'll be wild and out about it if that is what it's going to take to work it out,

so much shit to think about,

all this life crap got me stressed out,

but I won't fight you no more my stress reliever,

I won't act like you are the reason for my soul seizure

you are my angel and I wouldn't trade you for no one.

  ©EmKay and CrucialArts

WAS I NOT ENOUGH!!?

 Why did you go behind my back?

You suddenly developed bad blood

I wish I read the earlier signs

I ignored because I thought they would eventually die

Unfortunately they grew day by day

Here I thought you were in love with me

Only to realise I was the new side chic

Was it that hard to open up to me?

Tell me to my face you no longer had my feelings

It would be better than stabbing me

What's so special about her that I couldn't reach?

Was it because I was jobless and couldn't take you on a date?

Was it because I couldn't provide your needs?

Did my beauty fade all of a sudden?

Tell me what it is I did

So that I can be cautious with my next catch

We had dreams together

We had future plans together

What happened to all that?

Why did you decide to let them drown

Did I at anytime let you down?

Or did her attention exceed mine?

Am here drowning in sorrows

My tears wetting my pillows

Be it during sunset or sunrise

I'm still hoping you'll return someday

And say to me it was all a lie

But time is long gone

And I see you've moved on

Why do you have a heart of stone?

Do you realise how much you hurt me?

Or you and I were just a fling

You just made me a bridge

To cross to your next ship

All that is left are memories of you and I

Watching the stars high in the sky

In the midnight breeze at the balcony

Cuddling and promising each other sweet nothings

And running around during the day like little kids

Playing hide and seek

But that's stored at the back of our minds

And can never again be a reality 

I wish you happiness in your new destiny

I hope one day you'll miss me 😉

Because a day can't pass without you crossing my mind

For I loved you dearly

  © CrucialArts✍️

I AM A FALLEN HERO!!

Mama am sorry

Am sorry to the society

Sorry to those whose hopes were on me

I have failed terribly

I took advantage of the country's situation 

And went to visit my 'boyfriend'

I am now two in one

I am really growing fast

What will happen to my studies?

I wanted to be a nurse

What about my friends?

We planned of being entrepreneurs

It seems like my dreams are cut

I have to be a parent first

Before going back to class

I'll be behind my peers

I am currently drowning in tears

If only wishes were horses

I'd wish I never knew him

I'd wish I wasn't ripe for noticing

I'd wish to take back time

And take back covid to its origin

But who am I kidding?

My boyfriend said he loves me

And he would do no harm to ruin me

But now he's nowhere to be seen

He said he's not ready to be a daddy

And I should terminate my pregnancy

But where do I even start?

What if I follow as he says?

I'll have committed murder

An innocent foetus who means no harm

And who didn't ask to be sired 

What if I do as he says?

And then in the process my womb is destroyed

I'll never forgive myself

I can't stand to live with the guilt

Of killing a future leader

A future motivational speaker

Who'll tell the then generation to take care

Or else they'll end up like his/her mother

I'll have to take the bull by its horns

And put aside the longhorns

My so called boyfriend misled me first

I will not fall for his second trap

I will take care of my child

Even if it means to forever forget class

I'll make sure he/she never makes the same mistake

Because I've learnt my lesson hard

Experience is the best teacher

But I wish I experienced something better

Something that wouldn't have cut short my studies

Now I just have to be a young parent

A mother who's way underage

Please God give me the courage 

Wisdom....

To bring up my kid in the right way

Hello Papa

Please forgive my manners

I promised to never let you down

Now you say I've wasted your money on school fees

And all I did was entertain the so called boys

Your hard earned money has gone to waste

Am sorry I've broken our agreement 

Of studying hard and holding your hand in old age

I've learnt my lesson Papa

Don't hold a grudge against me

I can go back to class after this

And fulfill my promise

Only if you allow me

Papa please....

      ©CrucialArts ✍️

DON'T WAIT 'TIL I DIE!!

©CrucialArts

Don't wait 'til I die

For you to come to my burial and lie

Lie of how close we were

We were the ride or die buddies

Do you know what I went through before my death?

I asked for your help but you blueticked

I called your phone but it wasn't picked

You found my missed calls and never called back

You never bothered to ask

Whatever it is I was saying

Did you ever know I was unwell

I was sick and tired of the fake friendship

I was fed up with us being friends only in times of joy

And becoming strangers in times of need

  ©Purple Diva

I could not take it any longer

Yet you thought I was seeking attention

And gave me tension and silence

While I silently died a slow painful death

Dont wait 'til I die 

To get me flowers

Flowers that will wither and die 

Just like the friendship we once had

So lets talk now if we can

'Coz I don't want you to talk to dead me

Seeking closure and asking questions

Do what you want to do now

I don't know when death is coming for me

But am certain it will

And I hope you wont wait

You won't wait till I die

©CrucialArts

Don't wait 'til I die

For you to post a pic of us

Or even a pic I am alone

With a long caption of how you miss me

Of how it's early for me to leave

Of how you can't even believe 

That am no more 

And since we met it's been long

Please let us converse

Instead of tearing on my corpse

Let me water the lovely flowers now

And watch them blossom in my house

Instead of them withering on my grave

With no one to look after them

When the petals fall to the ground with no life

  ~ Don't wait 'til I die ~

MY UNTOLD STORY!!

    

Purple Diva

He took my dignity

My innocence

My pride

  CrucialArts

He took my purity

He didn't even consider my age

The pain or anything except his pleasure

  Purple Diva

It all started with the gifts

Sweets and chocolates 

And slowly I trusted him

  CrucialArts

I didn't know I would be a prey

Because he always came to my room we pray

How could I know that one day he would play

With my young innocent self

  Purple Diva

And it was no longer games

It all ended in tears 

Tears flowing while I got teared

Teared yet he didn't get tired

  CrucialArts

With my mouth covered

My hands tied

My body pinned to the floor

While his body enjoyed the rhythmic flow

   Purple Diva

And when he finished

He left me bleeding

With a death threat

If I told on him

  CrucialArts

Who would believe me anyway

He's the saint in the family

Everybody's favourite

From grannies to the younglings

  Purple Diva

So I cried myself to sleep

Yet no one noticed

That he kept hurting me

While he was good to them all

  CrucialArts

He pretended to be checking on me sleep

Whereas he only came to quench his thirst

And he would make it fast

So that nobody sensed a thing

  Purple Diva 

Then slowly I became angry and loathed them

And the loud kid became silent

For none in my family was my friend

And no one ever noticed my silent tears

  CrucialArts

My academics started deteriorating

My body became weak

And by the time my momma knew it

It was too late for revival

 Purple Diva

Too late for my smile was gone

And to date she still wonders 

What happened to her once happy girl

Because he took my innocence away

  CrucialArts

Is the threat still alive?

I fear death before I achieve

Should I stay silent forever?

I don't want to break their happy marriage

Will they believe me

Or they'll just call me an attention seeker

What's best for me now?

Should I stay on the low

Or should I let everybody know

That their favourite guy is a monster

  ~ Tears of a lonely heart ~

TEACH ME TO LOVE YOU

I might do things you don't love

And end up hurting your feelings

I don't want to loose your trust

Or question yourself whether we will last

Because of something I might do or say

So please baby

Teach me to love you

May I know what makes your body weak

Do you love it when I kiss your nose tip?

Or you'd prefer a kiss on the lips?

Do you love a peck on the cheeks?

How about on the forehead?

Or should I just peck your hand?

Please baby

Teach me to love you

 Should I hold your hand in public?

Would you mind if I introduced you to my friends?

Is it okey if I steal glances?

Especially when you less notice

I guess that's my fetish

Hey baby

Teach me to love you

May I post you on my WhatsApp status?

It's okey if they know my relationship status

Or you're not okey with the social media?

Please talk to me my dear

Should I set the record clear?

Teach me to love you

 I wanna take you to my hometown

Introduce you to my dad and mom

I know they'll be glad I made the right choice 

And they'll give us their blessings

Please baby give me a go ahead

Teach me to love you

Be the sister I never had

The sister I needed so bad

Be my one and only best friend

Be my one most trusted

I hope that's not too much to ask

So please baby,

Teach me to love you

  © CrucialArts✍️

WHEN I'M GONE!!

       _CrucialArts_

When am gone

Please don't even mourn

For I'll have left in Peace

Peace that those left behind are happy

Happy that I've left a legacy

A legacy that even the future generations can emulate 

For I'll have left behind good deeds

Good memories

Memories that all of you will remember me for

For I portrayed all the right virtues

Please don't hesitate to sing hymns in joy

Celebrate a life well lived

And be happy that I'll be at a better place

The place well prepared by our maker

And hope that one day we will together gather

Gather in new lifes and sing those happy hymns

    _Purple_Diva_

When am gone

Dont shed the tears

Instead rejoice in sheers

For indeed I lived

And left in joy

After a peaceful and happy life

Happy that I lived my truth

And became an icon of truth

Lest the generation embrace it

As I rest in peace

Indeed I leave behind many smiles, many sweet moments

In the hearts of you all I shall live

While making my last picture portrait

Remember all that I portrayed

And dance in joy all night long

Share merry, hugs and love

For indeed we shall meet again happy and jubilant

  _Maingi_

When am gone

Don't wallow in grief

Make the mourning brief

Neither throw yourself down a reef

I will want to go in peace without  any beef

And be of relief

Cause I'd be turning on a new leaf

Bringing in sheaf after sheaf

Yes, when am gone

Dress brightly on send off

And on my way i will shine

To dance and jig with angels

The Heavens will receive a champion 

Relief will beckon

Faces will be lifted up again

Because;

There will be Reincarnation 

When am gone!

 HOW IMPRUDENT COULD I BE??!!

"I'd choose you even in my next world
I will make sure you never lack
Because you're now my missing part
Which I never wish to be torn apart
I've finally found my better half
Who am going to settle down with
And make sure we bear intelligent kids
Because we were made for each other"

I wish I knew they were empty promises
But you made sure I fell for it
Why did you choose my heart to toy with?
I foolishly fell for your charms
Because you always welcomed me in your arms
How many more did they embrace?
For how long had you planned to play this?
So bad you're not a good actor
Had I trusted my instincts
Maybe I would have read the signs
When you came home late and lied with the office
And sometimes missed home because you were with the 'boys'
How foolish could I be not to read between the lines

I was dumb enough not to notice
That you never came back with the same shirt you left with
Because the weekends were meant for your side chicks
Was I that much blinded?
By the fact that you always provided
And I confused that with being loved
How foolish could I be,not to read between the lines

Maybe I wasn't enough for you
Because I lost shape after giving birth
And I was no longer the young girl you met
And now all you wanted was that sweet sixteen
But you forgot you were no longer a teen
So, all the girls wanted was your wallet
And they couldn't love you if you had empty pockets
Why did you choose to pass me through this?
All I did was to make you happy
Because together we made a cute family
But 'Till death do us part' was just a fallacy
In your eyes I was just a bimbo

    ©CrucialArts✍️

THE ABYSS YOU LEFT ME IN!!

    THE ABYSS YOU LEFT ME IN!!
In your eyes is where I knew love exists
And in the same eyes I experienced heartbreak
Did you really have to pass me through this
I thought with you I would walk down the isle
I always considered you my ride or die
But all you did to me was lie
You always hurt me and made me cry

The nights got colder and longer!
Coffee was not tasty anymore, it tasted quinine water. 
You always asked me to make latte for you, as we devoured the night together. 
Watching Game of Thrones. 
I been the queen to your throne. 
But i was thrown under the bus. 
Whack
Toxic teenage love.

I have avoided watching traffic at dusk
Because it always reminds me of you. 
The lights by then were bright and appealing
Honks and hoots were like a symphony
It was a spectre when the horizons would swallow the sun into a sunset oh so beautiful.
But now all that feels lifeless. 
Boring. 


In the numerous letters you sent me in high school, i had found a reason to believe in love.
I pinned them in my locker during class time, 
I took them to the dormitory with me at 9:45 P.M after group discussion.
And i would passionately kiss each of every letter you sent. Kiss, then sleep. 
It was a red letter day. Literally. 
But life comes at you fast, and in the same letters is where i tasted heartbreak.


Insomnia. 
I hid my last seen on WhatsApp because i didn't wish to see you online. 
I had no courage to block you, well i was new to such pain.
But inside i was caving in, i was still weak for you. 
I would stalk you, during my insomnia times. See if there were traces of you, and if so, traces of humanity left in you. 
Your statuses talked of someone who had moved on, someone who had found yet another one to deceive and deflower. 


But because time heals, yeah i did heal. 
Music helped, reading made me forget my troubles. 
I stopped wallowing in the abyss you left me in. 
I grew strong. Resilient. 
I was doing this for myself.
And for you reader who's spent  time to read me. 

#StaySafe 


…………………

™©

I WISH I HAD A MENTOR!!

I WISH I HAD A MENTOR

How would it be to have one who's a pastor?
Would he always talk about the scripture?
And talk of how the world will end in rapture
Would he ever tell me about day to day activities
Or I would have to know that from my neighbour
I wish to have a mentor

How would it be,to have one who is a doctor
Would she always tell me to drink enough water
And pass by the market buying some fruits
Would it always be about how to live healthy?
Or we would sometimes walk down the streets
Hand in hand narrating history
Or rather how our week has been
I don't want to always talk about balanced diet
I wish to have a mentor

How would it be, to have one who is a teacher?
Would they always compare life to Mathematics
Or they'll tell me it's as easy as ABC
I don't want to always talk English
Sometimes it would be nice to speak Swahili
And embrace our national language
I wish to have a mentor


How would it be, to have one who's a conductor
I think this would be a great idea
Because they're used to handling all kinds of people
And have stopped by so many stages already
So he will teach me how to control my anger
Teach me who and when to answer 
I wish to have a mentor

How would it be to have one who's a photographer?
I guess this would be the best feeling ever
They would help me view life in different angles
And teach me where and when to focus
Also teach me how to handle all forms of trials
I think I need a mentor who's a photographer
Because I truly wish to have a mentor
  © CrucialArts ✍️

WHAT IS LIFE!?

WHAT IS LIFE!?

Why does life have to be so indistinct?
Why does the world have to be so unfair?
I think I should just follow my instinct
I should just let the rope decide my fate
Or just take an overdose of this pills
What if I just throw myself into the sea?
And feed the crocodiles instead of the termites
How happy will they be to feed on such a sweet meal
But then again,how sad will my family be
For not giving me the 'last respect'
But what respect does a murderer deserve?
Shouldn't they be happy I've saved them many bills?
And having to meet every evening
Before deciding on Which day to let the soils swallow me
I've always had suicidal thoughts
Every time having different plots
Of how I'll end my life without much pain
But then again my family comes into my mind
What will happen to mama when am laid down 6 feet?
When she sees them throw soil on my coffin
With the pastor saying
"Dust unto dust and Ash unto Ash"
What will happen to my siblings?
Seeing their elder sister resting unwillingly
What example will I have set
Ofcourse heaven will not be so welcoming
So how will it be
Burning in hell endlessly?
Suicide is a sin
So my destination will only be one
But I've always wished to be in heaven
It's already my destined haven
So,,hey life!!
Please stop being too harsh
Be abit kind to me
My thoughts aren't so welcoming
To do this am not willing
   © CrucialArts ✍️